By Funke Babs-Kufeji
After more than 20 years working in fashion, I thought I had seen just about everything. I have watched hemlines go up and come back down, underwear become outerwear, clothes get tighter, looser, smaller and bigger, and trends we once laughed at return years later with new names and younger fans.
Very little shocks me anymore.
But every now and then, I see an outfit and find myself wondering: how much skin is actually too much skin?
Before anyone accuses me of becoming an old-fashioned fashion aunty, hear me out. I am not suggesting women should cover themselves from neck to ankle. I love sexy clothes. I love a good neckline, a beautiful backless dress, a daring slit and clothes that celebrate the body. Fashion should be fun. It should let us experiment, flirt a little, take risks, and occasionally wear something our mothers would never have approved of.
But surely there is still a line between sexy and simply showing everything?
These days, that line seems to be getting harder to find. A plunging neckline comes with a thigh-high slit and a completely open back. Sheer dresses arrive with almost nothing underneath. Micro-minis are so micro that sitting down becomes an engineering exercise. And sometimes you look at an outfit and wonder whether removing one more piece of fabric would technically make any difference.
Perhaps social media has changed the way we dress. Clothes no longer compete only for attention in a room; they compete on Instagram, TikTok, and every red carpet page waiting to post the most talked-about look of the night. And when attention is the prize, subtlety is at a disadvantage.
But this is where I think we may be losing something important: context.
The question should not always be, Can I wear this? Sometimes it should be, Where am I wearing this to?
A barely-there dress at a beach party in Mykonos is one thing. The same dress at somebody’s traditional wedding is another. A tiny crop top and shorts at a music festival make perfect sense. At a funeral? Perhaps not. Even the sexiest outfit can feel wrong when it enters the wrong room.
And weddings have become particularly interesting. I have seen guests in dresses with necklines down to the waist, slits almost meeting those necklines halfway, and dresses so short the wearer spends the entire evening pulling them down. At that point, are you actually enjoying the outfit or managing it?
Then there’s the gym, where activewear has become fashion in its own right. Leggings, sports bras, fitted shorts and bodysuits are practical, comfortable and designed for movement. But some gym looks now seem less concerned with working out than making sure every curve is visible from every possible angle. Again, wear what makes you happy, but I reserve the right to occasionally wonder where gym wear ends and exhibition begins.
Men are not entirely innocent either. Sagging trousers have been around forever, but there are moments when I see more boxer shorts than trousers and wonder which item I am actually supposed to be looking at.
What I don’t want this conversation to become is an excuse to police people’s bodies, especially women’s. Adults should be able to choose what they wear without strangers deciding that exposed skin says something about their character. A short dress does not tell you anything about a woman’s morals, intelligence or values.
But believing in freedom of choice doesn’t mean we can no longer talk about taste.
And perhaps taste is really the conversation I am trying to have.
Some of the sexiest women I have ever seen were not wearing the least amount of clothing in the room. Their clothes fitted beautifully. There was one unexpected flash of skin. A low back. A strong neckline. A slit that appeared when they walked. You noticed the woman first and the dress second.
That, to me, is far more seductive than putting everything on display at once.
Maybe after 20 years in fashion, my eye has become more particular. I still love a daring look. I still believe fashion should push boundaries, and I certainly don’t want everybody suddenly dressing like they are headed to a board meeting.
But I do miss the art of leaving something to the imagination.
So again, how much skin is too much skin? I suspect the answer changes depending on who is wearing it, where they are going and how they carry it. But if your neckline, slit, open back, sheer panel, and micro hemline are all fighting for attention at the same time, perhaps one of them could take the evening off.
